WHAT A GUY!

So...I am seeing Jared still....5 months and going strong and guess what he does!?!?! This week has been a crazy busy week for me; I had my sons birthday party on Friday, my friends son's party on Satuday, my nephews party on Saturday, and Jared's nephews party on Saturday but none the less Jared pulled one out for the team. He got all the arrangements made and surprised me with concert tickets to Evanescence!!! WhAT A GUY!! :) He made arrangements with my mother to watch the kids, got us a hotel room, booked sushi, and the concert all without me knowing!! I have never ever in my wildest dreams thought I could be treated this good! Stayed tuned folks!! Lots more great stuff to come..this one is a keeper for sure! :) BTW...below is a picture of the Shark cake I made for my sons birthday!!! :)

Zumba Love

Zumba fitness has been a blessing in my life...it gave me confidence, support, created friendships, help me get my old body back (pre-kids body) and showed me I can have fun again!

I love to dance and so this was the perfect outlet for me to jump into and get back to my old self again!

I have had the pleasure of meeting so many wonderful people and making new life long friendship opening my eyes so to many new things!

                                                                 ZES Priscilla Maribal!

I have also been lucky enough to get my Zumbatomic license to teach children!! It is not only rewarding but sooo fun!!

Zumba has been amazing..I highly recommend anyone who has not tried out a zumba class to do so!!

I am blessed in that I have had the opportunity to meet so many HUGE names in Zumba, including Priscilla Maribal, Macie Gill, and DJ Francis!!!

I have been a Zumba instructor for over a year teaching Zumba Basic 1, Zumba Basic 2, Zumbagold, as well as Zumbatomic! Join the party!!!

Starting all over!

Okay guys, divorce was granted and here I am...all alone, starting in this brand new world that I have never experienced. You see, if you remember I have been with Shawn since I was 15, he never once took me on a date and I never experienced any of the "normal" things of growing up dating and exploring the world. We move into our new house in October 2011 and it's BEAUTIFUL!  The kids are finally adjusting to life with just mommy and never seeing daddy and I have fallen into the role of single parent quite nicely. One thing I didn't mention is that not only do I work full time in marketing but I also go to school full time online, teach Zumba fitness classes 2 nights a week, play adult coed softball, both my children play t-ball, and now my son just started basketball...I know, crazy right?!?! I have a crazy, busy, stressful, happy, fun, non stop life and I love it! Ok Ok, back to the story. The house is great and we were getting ready for our 1st holiday as a family of 3...Halloween!!! I wanted to make sure everything stayed as normal as possible for them; costumes, candy, and fun..so X was an escaped convict and J was an 80's bride :) did I mention I love my babies! We trick or treated and had a great time..not once did they mention missing daddy or act sad...SUCCESS! Moving on, Sometime after the divorce was final I crossed pathes with Jack again!! We got together and starting dating...now some people would look at that and think wow, so soon..but I am grateful that he was there in my time of need to comfort me and show me that not all men were the same as Shawn and he more then anything was a friend when I needed one most! Sadly I must report that Jack and I didn't work out, not because he didn't want to be together but because we were at different points in life and didn't want to pressure either of us to settle for something we didn't want or weren't ready for. Jack and I are still, to this day great friends! After Jack and I split up I was pretty down and out..until Jerry came along. Jerry is kind, considerate, sweet, single, handsome, never been married, neve had kids, has his own place, vehicle, and steady job!! PERFECT!!! Jerry and I started talkin on the phone around mid-september and are still together today! Moving forward from Halloween comes Thanksgiving! This was gonna be the toughest holiday yet as it's meant to be with family and this will be the 1st year for the kids without their father and also other changes were coming...we were going to be meeting Jerry's family! The day came and we were dressed in our best ready to go eat...and again..no mention of their sad or a hint of sadness!! SUCCESS!! Now you may ask...where was their dad during this time? well the answer put simply is...he had better things to do..I guess! It's crazy to me how a dad can be in his kids lives 5 years everyday, being there and then all the sudden he forgets he's a father...I dunno how he sleeps at night! Christmas was finally approaching and I made sure that I had just as many presents for the kids as they have gotten in years previous..I didn't feel it was fair for them to have less of a Christmas because mommy and daddy split up! Christmas morning and and HOLY COW, santa brought tons of stuff :) they were excited and happy and NO MENTION OF DADDY! Now, I will say..they did see Shawn before Christmas but he didn't get them any presents and only spent 1 hour and 45 mintues with them! After Christmas Jerry and I decided to take the kids on a trip..we went to Branson, MO and if you have never been I highly recommend it! We stayed at the Welk Resort with an indoor water slide and pool then spent the evening at the Dixie Stampede having dinner and watching a show...the kids have a fabolous time and I think it's something they will never forget! :) So far this new life of mine has turned out pretty great...I have a great couple of kids, a great family that helps and supports me when I need it, a great new guy in my life that has brought lots of love and laughter, and great friends who hold my hand and tell me the truth about how things really are! I am pretty much in love with life right now!

Crazy/Happy: Let's go back....wayyyy back!

Crazy/Happy: Let's go back....wayyyy back!: To get a true sense of how CRAZY my life really is, we have to go back...wayyy back. To set the scene I am gonna place you in small town Ar...

Let's go back....wayyyy back!

To get a true sense of how CRAZY my life really is, we have to go back...wayyy back. To set the scene I am gonna place you in small town Arkansas, year 2001, on the "strip" (a 1/2 mile in front of local stores that cars cruised up and down). I was 15 living the dream; I had lots of friends, good grades, trust from my parents and nothing but time...until...I met HIM! Now pay close attention to the HIM in this story because that is where the craziness starts. I met "shawn" (for privacy issues we will keep his true name withheld) one summer night on the strip and that was the beginning of it all. He was 18 at the time and the guy that everyone wanted, well as luck would have it....I got him. We became boyfriend/girlfriend in August of 2001. Now this sounds like a fairy tale right? Wrong!!! I started sneaking out of the house, skipping school, having sex, lying, and missing work..my life was pretty much turned upside down..now this is the point where you say "why didn't you just break up with him?" Well, good question! Shawn and I were together all through my highschool years...we went to my junior prom together WHICH HE MESSED AROUND WITH ANOTHER GIRL AT!..we did everything together...then comes senior year, 2004. In 2004 Shawn was deployed to Iraq and that was when the real trouble began. He did 6months of training in Ft. Hood, TX where I believe he cheated on me with every girl in sight or so it seems. I went to visit Shawn with my mother before he deployed and wouldn't ya know, he had a photo of a local girl from TX in his wallet and even left me at the hotel to go be with her!! What an A-hole right? Now you ask again.. "Why didnt you break up with him?" Again, very good question. I stayed with Shawn, saw him off to his deployment and waited 12 long months for him to return. Those 12 months were no walk in the park; we argued, he messed around with girls that he was deployed with and then the worst...a friend of mine from highschool who was deployed with him came home on leave only to tell me that he knew Shawn was messing with (7) count them (7) girls overseas. I was furious but still held on to my relationship. During this whole deployment my family and I were planning my wedding to Shawn...I know, Crazy right?!? After I found out about the 7 girls I called off the wedding...Shawn came home 2 weeks later for his leave (a 2week visit home from overseas during deployment) and wouldn't ya know, my dumb butt ran off and secretly married the dude at our local courthouse, no family, no friends, JUST US! My family and his family had no clue, not for 2 weeks anyways. My parents were devastated not only because they missed out on their only daughters wedding but also becasue they knew I was making a huge mistake. The 2 weeks were up and Shawn had to go back to Iraq, he only had a couple months left then he would be home for good and I was left to clean up the mess of our spur of the moment wedding. Everyone was furious and stayed that way for a long time. When Shawn came home we moved right away out of town, we felt we needed "US" time, whatever that means! Looking back now, I just think he wanted me away from influences that may have made me see the error of my ways! SO, we move..two hours away..and SURPRISE...I get pregnant! IT'S A BOY!  My son was born and things got tough, I was raising him basically as a single mother even though I was married and THAT was not fun or fair. Shortly after the birth of my son, who we will call X, my grandpa committed suicide! Now when you imagine having your heart ripped from your chest and feeling every ounce of pain from it, that's how I felt when I found out! My granpa was a great man, a wonderful man, whom I miss dearly to this day! I went to his funeral, just X and me (Shawn didn't go b/c he "couldn't get off work" later found out that was a lie). While gone away to the funeral Shawn was distant and strange...well guess why?? I get home to find condom wrappers on our dresser, OPENED ones! Wanna know what happens next? Once again, I make the wrong decision, stay with him, and we move back home to where our family is.....SURPRISE...pregnant again! At this point my son X is only 3 months old and here I am 6 weeks pregnant! This time around we have a little girl, J. From outside appearance we are doing good, stable home, 2 great kids, and we seemed to be making our marriage work..until..we get evicted from our rental house..you see, Shawn has an anger issue..he likes to punch and break things...trashing every house we have ever lived in..and our landlord decided to drop by for a visit and was not HAPPY. Once evicted my parents made a deal that the children and I could live with them but Shawn was on his own, we got him settled in a local sleezebag motel, the kids and I visited him everynight. So it's that time again and Shawn gets deployed a 2nd time to Iraq, this time he does 3 months of training Louisiana and then off to Iraq...Well SURPRISE....I get a letter in the mail the 1st day he stepped foot in country overseas from the OCSE...if any of you don't know who that is...it is the Office of Child Support Enforcement!!!! That's right Shawn got another girl pregnant...GASP!!! I know, crazy right?!? Not just any girl, but a girl I grew up with, lived down the street from me my whole life, dated my brother, a girl that knew we were married. This is the beginning of our "baby momma drama". I was beside myself and separated from Shawn. During this separation I dated 2 other guys...who were nice and treated me well but one of them was special. "Jack" (pay attention b/c Jack pops back up later) was great, fun, sweet, and he made me feel like I was the only woman that mattered. By nature, I am extremely honest...some would say to a fault..so I let Shawn know about Jack, I felt he had the right to know as legally we were still married and we had children together. Shawn was not ok with it, he started causing drama...calling Jack and threatening him (yes, while he was overseas, you would think he didn't have time for drama like this but you would be surprised what they actually do during deployments) Jack didn't like all the drama and decided that after 3 months, right then wasn't the best time for us to be together and told me if there was ever a point where Shawn would be in the picture in such a dramatic was that he would try again...well time goes on and Shawn comes home from deployment...get ready for it....we get back together!!! I justified it by saying if I was gonna fight and argue with other guys in relationships I might as well fight and argue with the father of my children. You see, my thought on marriage has always been you get married once and you make it work regardless, there is nothing you can't get over or forgive. That philosophy has screwed me royally over the years. Anywas back to the story, Shawn comes home and things are HORRIBLE....his PTSD is kicking in, he's anger, lazy, and all he wants to do is drink and cheat. I want you to close your head and think of what a marriage from hell would be like to you...times that by 100 and that was my marriage for the next 3 years!! Ok, now fast forward to 2011...Shawn is working for an oil company making good money and everything seems to be finally settling down and going right...until he gets sick. I don't mean sick like flu, I mean sick like dying from a crazy bacterial disease he got from drinking homemade wine..I know, Crazy Right?!? Anyways, like I good wife I was there for my husband..sat by his hospital bed only to be woke up from a dead sleep by my internal warning system. Now ladies, you will understand what I am talking about here. Have you ever just had everything within you telling you something, the urge so strong you can't resist it? Well thats what happened, I woke up, sat straight up in the bed at 3am and something inside me said "check his phone!" I got the phone, scrolled through a lil bit and saw bunches and bunches of females...by the way..FACEBOOK was the #1 cheating tool my husband used, those damn private messages! So in seeing these females, one specific one jumps out at me...I read through the messages only to see him tell the girl " I wish you were here instead of her". Now for years and years everyone would tell me "when your done, your done; and you will know it"...well ladies and gents..I WAS DONE! I woke up my husband, told him what I saw, and walked calmly out of that house! I stayed with a friend for a week then moved the kids and I in with my parents, then filed for divorce! I WAS DONE DONE DONE! 10 years of hell and that was what it took. I didn't cry, I wasn't sad, I was at peace..for once in 10 years I felt calm and at ease. It didnt take but a month and half for my lawyer to file the paperwork and the judge to grant our divorce...and August 11, 2011..2 days shy of our anniversary..it was over! The following months have been crazy...I lived with my parents for a couple months then finally the kids and I were able to afford our own place...and I am sure you are not surpised one bit to hear that he doesn't pay child support or see his children! So now that you have the back story...we can start from the present, the very great, wonderful, NEW, present! :)